Children and technology

Media technology is here to stay and has become a permanent part of our lives. But there is great concern about how it may be affecting our children. I believe we can learn to embrace its advantages, reduce its adverse effects and raise children who can still relate heart to heart with people, appreciate and participate in the beauty and wonders of nature and grow up to be well rounded, healthy, caring and compassionate adults. The challenge for parents is to understand the benefits and pitfalls of children’s technology use and to help their children create balance in their lives.

Why should we be concerned?

The amount of time children spend using media technology, including computers, cell phones, video games and MP3 players among others, is setting off alarms. The fear is not only that this technology is replacing physical and imaginative play, but that it also may be diminishing development of social skills, heart connection and empathy for others.

Children and teens between ages eight and 18 spend an average of seven hours and 38 minutes daily playing video games, going online and watching TV, and most have no household rules governing how much time they’re allowed to spend doing these things, according to the 2010 study, “Generation M2: Media in the Lives of 8- to 18-Year-Olds,” conducted by the Kaiser Family Foundation. Add to that the time spent eating, sleeping and attending school during the week, and little time is left for anything else such as playing outside or at the playground with other children, participating in athletics, socializing with friends and family or engaging in afterschool and weekend activities.

Studies over the past decade have concluded that a large number of adolescents and teens today are having difficulty identifying emotions in people, thus creating an inability to feel empathy toward others who may be feeling pain, sorrow, anger and other emotions. There is concern that excessive viewing of real or contrived violence online and/or playing video games that are violent or contain other age-inappropriate content could be numbing the sensitivities of young people, immunizing them from experiencing compassion and caring for others.

The effects of divorce on children

Many children whose parents divorce every year feel as if their worlds are falling apart. Divorcing parents are usually very concerned about the welfare of their children during this troublesome process.
Yet parents who split have reasons for hope. Researchers have found that only a relatively small percentage of children experience serious problems in the wake of divorce or, later, as adults.

Rapid Recovery
Divorce affects most children in the short run, but research suggests that kids recover rapidly after the initial blow. In a 2002 study psychologist E. Mavis Hetherington and her then graduate student Anne  found that many children experience short-term negative effects from divorce, especially anxiety, anger, shock and disbelief. These reactions typically diminish or disappear by the end of the second year. Only a minority of kids suffer longer.

Most children of divorce also do well in the longer term. In a quantitative review, sociologist Paul R. Amato, examined the possible effects on children several years after a divorce. The studies compared children of married parents with those who experienced divorce at different ages. The investigators followed these kids into later childhood, adolescence or the teenage years, assessing their academic achievement, emotional and behavior problems, delinquency, self-concept and social relationships. On average, the studies found only very small differences on all these measures between children of divorced parents and those from intact families, suggesting that the vast majority of children endure divorce well.

Researchers have consistently found that high levels of parental conflict during and after a divorce are associated with poorer adjustment in children. The effects of conflict before the separation, however, may be the reverse in some cases. In a 1985 study Hetherington and her associates reported that some children who are exposed to high levels of marital discord prior to divorce adjust better than children who experience low levels. Apparently when marital conflict is muted, children are often unprepared when told about the upcoming divorce. They are surprised, perhaps even terrified, by the news. In addition, children from high-discord families may experience the divorce as a welcome relief from their parents' fighting.

The effects of television on children

Television can help children relax after school, homework, play or sport. But this can create a habit that might be hard to break later. TV can also take time away from more creative play. Here are some ideas to help you find a balance.Most child development experts recommend limiting children’s daily screen time: no more than two hours a day for children over five. Screen time includes TV, DVD and computer time.

This is for the following reasons:

• The time children spend watching TV should be balanced with activities that are good for their development. These include active play, creative play (such as solving puzzles and drawing), sport and conversation with family and friends.
• Children can become too reliant on TV for ‘something to do’.
• Even having a TV on in the background affects children’s concentration.

A good balance of developmental activities with homework, sport and music should leave little time for TV.When you watch TV with your child, you can explain what’s happening and respond to your child’s reactions. You can also point out when characters behave in good and not-so-good ways. When you’re choosing TV or DVD programs for your school-age child, it’s a good idea to avoid the following:

• scary images. School-age children are getting better at processing scary or sad images, but they might still be upset by movies or programs showing the death of a parent or threats to children and animals
• violent content. Children in this age group might imitate violent behaviour if they see their TV heroes using violence to get what they want. This is true for cartoons and live-action shows
• TV news. Children at school are old enough to understand that things on the news are real. Reports of natural disasters and violent crimes, especially in familiar settings, can make them feel unsafe. Some parents prefer to record the news and watch it later, or watch a late bulletin

As children enter the school years and adolescence, the sexy images, clothes and dance moves on these programs can affect the way girls, in particular, feel about themselves and their sexual development.
Children under eight don’t understand that ads are designed to sell things. They believe that the ‘information’ in ads is true. Some ads work by making kids feel bad about themselves or how they look. These can be very damaging for children’s self-image and self-esteem.

Try to turn off the TV when the program is over. It can help to plan a smooth transition to another activity. Many parents find it easier to get children ready for school if the TV stays off in the morning. Kids find it easier to concentrate at school if they haven’t been watching TV. If your child’s favourite programs are on in the morning, just record them. This way your child can watch them later in the day, when you’re both tired and more in need of a break.