Outrage with dignity - Paula Manoli-Gray

It's been nearly a year since the infamous Haircut on bank deposits, and despite it being a hard and depressing time for the island and for the majority of individuals, it has certainly gone by fast.

At the time, I couldn't imagine what the state of the island would be like a year down the line and my head was filled with thoughts of Armageddon-type scenarios, especially in the period where everyone was panic withdrawing their money, and some places wouldn't accept credit cards.

One friend and her husband started growing their own food in a bid to become self sufficient as he had convinced her that people would be fighting in the streets for food as the crisis deepened. I have to admit, I stocked up on torches, batteries, matches and tinned food!

But what really surprised me is the lack of riots… although I am not sure if this is a positive or negative aspect of us as a society.

On the one hand, some might say that our lack of rioting and outrage is a sign of apathy, weakness and laziness. They would argue that in other countries all over the world, the people have risen up and displayed their unwillingness to accept the decisions that the powers that be have made on their behalf. They would probably be disgusted that we appear to have sat back and allowed ourselves to be used and abused.

But on the other hand, this shows that we are a nation with dignity who know that to start taking to the streets, setting them alight and looting, whilst attacking the police, would only do us more harm than good. You only have to look at the state of the countries that have taken to this method to see that it only makes things worse and prolongs the country's decline – sometimes indefinitely. That is not to say there haven't been protests and strikes, but there hasn't been any of the ugliness seen in other countries. Those on this side of the fence could further argue that the people of Cyprus – of all nationalities – did something far more powerful and impacting; they rallied around and supported one another.

In a previous column, I spoke about the real sense of community that the island has, and how people are showing compassion and generosity to those who are suffering the most. Even those who don't have much are giving to those who have even less, and I am so proud of my island for reacting in this way of love and humanity, instead of raining destruction and violence on its towns to demonstrate the pain and strain we are under. With this attitude, the island is going to bounce back far quicker than those who wrote us off have predicted.

It was never going to be easy or painless and at times the injustice and conditions that prevail make me want to scream. The weight of the sacrifices that so many are making seems insurmountable.

But when it all feels like too much, I try and think how things will be in yet another year's time, and I know in my heart that the way we chose to handle the situation will be a credit to us all.

First appeared in the Cyprus Weekly, 01/03/14

Beatrix Potter - Spring Tea Party

Famagusta Parents Network

Larnaca Parents Network Expands 

http://www.famagustaparentsnetwork.com

Mums with Special Angels (Cyprus) monthly meet - Paula Manoli-Gray

Dinner an opportunity for support and advice

Mums with Special Angels (Cyprus) is holding its next meeting for mothers of children with special needs on Friday, with all welcome.

Until recently, the group would meet at the toy library with their children, but the format has now changed to a monthly dinner for the mothers only, so that they can enjoy a relaxed evening of conversation, support and the exchange of ideas without the distraction of supervising the children.

The group was set up by Elena Papadopoulos two years ago after she moved to Cyprus from the UK. As a HR Consultant and Life Coach, mother of 6 year-old twins and a 4 year-old daughter with Downs Syndrome, Elena recognised the need for a support group like those in the UK; one where others would know they are not alone in facing the challenges that come with raising children with special needs.

There are currently around 10 mums from all districts of the island that attend the dinners – held at a different restaurant each month. They are of all nationalities, and have children of all ages with a variety of special needs including Down's Syndrome, autism, Aspergers, and many without a diagnosis.

On the evening, Elena facilitates the event so that mums can converse comfortably: "I normally split the table so that the mums can speak freely in their preferred language. They talk about all sorts of topics from therapies and emotional support to finances and siblings. It's basically a place where mums can talk freely and leave feeling that they are not on their own."

The group is having a real impact on the mothers that attend, as it is a valuable opportunity to talk to people who understand the issues affecting parents of special needs children, and there is even sometimes a therapist at the dinner who offers free advice and support.  Elena is keen to stress that it's about support and empowerment: "The mums are a bunch of positive ladies trying to do their best for their kids, we want to make a positive difference and help our kids have a better life here in Cyprus, or wherever they want to live."

One mum of a 6 year-old autistic boy says of the experience:  "Other than a great meal, I got to meet other mums that understand exactly what it feels like to have a child like mine. We discussed similar traits and differences between our children; strategies that worked or that we have tried out. We had a good old laugh at the horror stories and swapped information on doctors/therapists and diagnosis. I always leave with a great feeling of not being alone in all this".  Another says: "It's a lovely evening meeting people in a similar situation to yourself, and it so nice to be with people that know what you go through on a daily basis. You leave feeling you are not alone – it's a mums therapy session."

Aside from the monthly dinners, there is also a Facebook page -Mums with Special Angels (Cyprus) – where dads are also welcomed. The group offers information and exchanges between members, as well as posts from therapists and other professionals, with all languages welcome.

Elena is always looking for volunteers who can offer their time to help the group for a few hours a week, as anyone who can offer ideas and/or activities for the children or mums.

This month's dinner will take place at 7.30pm at The Balti House, Dhekelia Road, Oroklini and costs are split between the ladies, normally around €25 per person. 

You can contact Elena on: 96767625 / elenavik@hotmail.com for more information, to attend the dinner, or offer your time and help.

                       

 

The Cypriot scapegoats

Watching recent footage of the flood situation in England, my family and I cannot believe that the scenes belong to the UK in 2014. The England I remember leaving for Cyprus has remained in my mind as a place of law, order, organisation, and preparation and readiness for such disasters. It is shocking to see that the weather has got so out of control that it is beyond the capabilities of the government to deal with.

Talking with my (English) husband, we both agreed that if it had been Cyprus in the same flooded situation, everyone's reaction would have been one of blame for Cypriots who are generally believed to be incompetent. Immediately, we would be hearing criticism and ridicule towards the people, the island and the government, along with distain at the way they were handling the situation or that they let it reach that point in the first place. In the case of England, although the government has come in for some flack, the reaction has been mainly one of sympathy, empathy and horror that people are suffering. I believe this is completely different to how the situation would be viewed in Cyprus, where many – including those who live here – see the country and its people as a joke.

Granted, it only takes a few hours of rain for our poorly constructed roads to start flooding, so we would be truly stuffed if we were in England's position, but that is not my point… I am sick and tired of people treating the island and its inhabitants as second-class yokels who have no idea what they are doing.

Naturally, there are many things in Larnaca – and the island – that can be improved, or that have not been thought out properly. This could be partly blamed on the culture of nepotism, whereby some positions are occupied through connections rather than merit, but if we were really that poorly managed and that useless, then how on earth would the country function the way it does!

Everywhere you go you will encounter people who are good at their job and people who are not. Every country has its good politicians and its bad. There isn't a nation that doesn't have a police force with its share of diligent cops, as well as corrupt ones. In every single corner of the planet you will find those who try to better the country through power and those who are so drunk on it that they abuse it horribly. So why are Cypriots always the ones to blame?

I have said it before in these pages, so forgive me for saying it again – this crisis is going to eventually be good for past grievances. If you believe that the country has been run on nepotism, you will find that people just won't be able to get away with it any more. If you felt the service you received in banks, government offices and shops was shoddy, then you will find that people will be humble and grateful to have a job and will work hard to ensure they keep it.

On top of that, Larnaca is undergoing a lot of changes to its infrastructure, so hopefully, our once-shoddy roads will be a thing of the past. Once that has combined with a generally more amenable workforce, I hope all those who have considered Larnaca and Cyprus to be the land of clowns, cowboys and incompetent fools will find that they can no longer make Aphrodite's beautiful island a scapegoat for all the world's woes!